The Pleasure Disconnect
If you are anything like me - upon awakening you hit the ground running. There are things to do, texts to respond to, work emails to catch up on and there certainly isn’t time for a 45 minute morning routine to set yourself up for mental stability.
This behaviour is exactly what led me to studying the nervous system and eventually becoming a Breathwork Facilitator and it is embarrassing to admit that I still struggle with slowing down.
It was easy for me to see how my hectic life was impacting my anxiety and stress but the thing it was impacting the most was my ability to feel pleasure - inside and outside of the bedroom.
Based on my years of working with clients, I now know that I am not in the minority here. Most of my work is spent around teaching people to slow the heck down and listen to what their needs are.
Advocating for your needs is an entirely different topic that requires
a few blog posts but we’ll get to that one day!
This disconnection, often rooted in cultural taboos and personal insecurities, has far-reaching consequences that extend beyond fleeting dissatisfaction. When we lose touch with our capacity for pleasure, we lose touch with a vital part of our humanity, affecting our mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
Pleasure is not a luxury;
it is an essential component of a balanced and fulfilling life.
When we starve ourselves from the ability to experience and appreciate moments of joy, we become susceptible to burnout and depression. The simple pleasures of life, such as savoring a delicious meal, enjoying a sunset, or laughing with friends - become muted. This dulling of our sensory experiences can make the world seem gray and monotonous, leading to a decrease in overall life satisfaction and motivation.
The impact of this disconnection is perhaps most acutely felt in the bedroom. Sexual pleasure is a profound form of connection with oneself and one's partner, yet many struggle to fully embrace it due to lingering shame, guilt, or body image issues. This can lead to a lack of intimacy and communication in relationships, as well as decreased sexual satisfaction. When we are unable to access and express our own desires, we also struggle to connect with our partner’s needs, creating a cycle of frustration and distance.
Reconnecting with our pleasure is not just about enhancing our sexual experiences;
it is about reclaiming our right to joy and fulfillment in all aspects of life.
By engaging in practices that foster body awareness, such as sensual somatic exercises, breathwork, and mindful meditation - we can begin to dismantle the barriers that keep us from our pleasure.
This journey towards reconnection not only enriches our intimate relationships but also revitalizes our daily experiences, infusing them with a renewed sense of wonder and delight. In embracing our pleasure, we embrace our fullest selves, allowing us to live more vibrant, connected, and joyful lives.
If you are tired of feeling disconnected from your pleasure - maybe it is time to take a step into dismantling this old way of thinking so you can step into a profound state of joy and pleasure. That choice is entirely up to you.
If you’d like support in that realm, the
Behind Closed Doors Membership is waiting for you.
This is a virtual space that is dedicated to women and vulva-havers to reconnect to their joy and pleasure.
There are copious amounts of workshops and meditations designed to bring you home to yourself one practice at a time.
